More On Snelling

According to sources on the Internet, Chris Snelling enjoys eating beans. While this news would be fascinating by itself, . We recently received a photo that appears to show Chris Snelling eating beans with his right hand!


As you can see, someone is eating beans and enjoying this eating. Is it Chris Snelling? You can decide for yourself. Consider the similarities.

Both are white, both wear blue hats, both have crazy brown hair, and both enjoy beans. How can there be any doubt?

A Clarification

In my previous post, I included a picture of Chris Snelling in which he appears to be wearing his glove on his left hand, indicated that he is right-handed. To the best of my knowledge, Chris Snelling is actually left-handed. I have come up with a few theories to explain this discrepancy.

1) Chris Snelling is an Australian spy. He is naturally right-handed, but learned to play baseball left-handed as a disguise. When this picture was taken he was caught out of character. If I ever disappear mysteriously, assume it is because the Australian government has kidnapped me for discovering the identity of their secret agent.

2) Perhaps the picture I received was actually the mirror image of the original picture. The speech bubble is not affected by this reversal since it is not actually part of the photo. However, the text on the shirt would be reversed. This means that Snelling's shirt read instead of . Why would such a shirt exist? Exactly for this purpose, so that with a little photo manipulations, left-handers could turn into right-handers. But why would anyone do this? Well, the Nationals are actually run by J.B. Onstoper, an 81-year old man who with lives with his pet bear in a cave in South Dakota and harbors an irrational prejudice against left-handers. Mr. Onstoper delegates most of the management of the team, but he has to approve all new player acquisitions. Since he never leaves his cave, he makes all his decisions based on photos of the players sent by his employees. If the Nationals ever wish to acquire a left-handed player, they make him don the reverse-Nats shirt then perform the appropriate alterations to the photo before sending it to Dakota.

3) Distorted perception of reality

The Vidro Trade In Pictures

Jose Vidro goes to Seattle. Good luck with your new team, Jose.



Chris Snelling comes to DC. Snelling is Australian, which is very exciting. As far as I know, the only other Australian the Nats have in their system is Rhys Taylor, but he barely counts because he disappeared in July.



Emiliano Fruto also comes to the Nats. He has an awesome name. He looks like a turtle, because as reported here, he has gained 70 pounds over the last 6 years.


Jim Bowden is happy. Good job, Jim.